Sadness ;o(

On Saturday it would have been my dad's 72nd birthday. I tried not to think about it to much but couldn't help but do so and realize how much I miss him. Even though there were a few years that we did not have a relationship I still loved him because he was my dad. I can still remember his stupid, silly jokes and sayings and they still make me laugh today. He was a great cook and he loved to garden as well.

He passed away about 9 years ago and I still remember the day because I had just moved into a new apartment and he was admitted into the hospital so my sister and I decided that we would go up to see him. We did not even get to start on our way before he passed. We ended up going and helping with the funeral and all. It was a very nice service and I got to see a lot of my relatives that I had not seen in a long time.

I will always have fond memories of my dad and have forgotten the bad ones. I miss you daddy and I love you always.

State Champions

Well it has been since 1997 since we were Football Class 3A State Champions! The football team did an amazing job last night beating the Franklin Indians from Reisterstown, MD 21-14. The boys were so excited after the game with tears of joy running down their tired and exhausted faces. It was a rough season going into the play offs with an 8-3 record, but we persevered to beat Atholoton Raiders, then on to beat Riverhill Hawks whom both had great seasons with only 1 or 2 losses each. Then onward to VICTORY against the Damascus Hornets with a 21-14 win to the #1 one team in the 3A division with a 12-0 record. After that game our wonderful Wilde Cats knew they could win states with the positive attitude they had going into all the games. In the end they did what everyone thought they could not do, Wilde Lake was and always has been considered the underdog in football for the past few years, but now they are back on top. Coach Harrison deserves a great pat on the back for believing in his team that they could do what they needed to do to win the Championship game. My hats are off to the boys and their well deserved win. GO CATS!

WOW--what changes

Well, since my major melt down a few weeks ago things have changed around my home for the better to. The boys have been doing better with picking things up and putting stuff away. Although they have not improved on doing their chores on their own but they are starting to get the hint that I am not their maid.

I was hoping that football was going to be over when we played against Atholton but nope we won that game. Then when we were slated to play River Hill I just knew that since we had not beat them in years that we would surely lose-----Nope we beat them too. So when we were facing the #1 team in the 3A East conference I knew (since we lost to them big time about 3 years ago) that there was no way that we were going to beat Damascus High School. But that was the third strike and I lost that bet too. So now we are on to the State Championship Playoffs on Thursday December 2, 2010. The last time we were there was in 2007 when Steven was a sophomore at Wilde Lake now that Shawn is a sophomore at Wilde Lake we are going again. I hope we win that would be amazing since this is our Varsity Coaches 2nd year as Head Coach. I will keep you updated.

Ron and I have been attending marriage classes taught by a great couple in our ward that the church is encouraging people to attend and I for one can say that it has improved our relationship a lot since we started this class. We are communicating better and able to control our anger towards each other better as well. I can see the changes in our home life as well as our relationship with each other as well. I guess I just needed a kick in the butt to realize what I needed to work on as much as what we each needed to work on.

Well, I will try to post more on the changes that are happening in our family as we go on this path of life. Here's to starting the CHRISTmas season with a good feeling and lots of love to all my friends and family.

Major Melt Down

So last night I got home and once again no one had done anything to help around the house but yet they were all watching TV, playing video games or on the computer. I left the house at 5:30 and did not go home until 9:30 PM took my insulin shot, got ready for bed and have not spoken to anyone since 5:30 PM the night before. I am still mad about how lazy everyone has gotten in my house. I work hard and for them not to help out is just not right. I may have to run away from home for a few days just to get my sanity back.

Teenagers

UUGGHH! I am having so many difficulties with my youngest son right now that I just want to SCREAM! He is pushing his limits with me to the very end of a short rope right now. I have gotten so many emails and phone calls from teachers about his performance or lack of in class, or his clowning around in class, not doing homework, making inappropriate comments or just being disruptive. What am I going to do??? He hates seminary, church, boy scouts, school, me, his life. I know that each child is different and we need to treat them as so, but why was Steven so easy and Shawn so difficult? He talks to me as if he is annoyed that I even have the audacity to speak to him. He has not respect for anyone but himself, he is very chauvinistic in his thoughts and actions (where he picked this up from I haven't a clue), it is beneath him to do anything that I ask and he feels that I should be his maid, chef and whatever else he deems beneath him to do. What can I do, say, what? When I tell people about it they are shocked that Shawn would be like that and I tell them you only see what he wants you to see. I am at my wits end with this child.

Rainy Days and Mondays Always Gets Me Down!

Well to start off this was a MONDAY and it was Raining. Then someone hit my car and I find out that a "High School Coach" was not man enough to tell my son something to his face that he had to have some of his peers tell him. What kind of person does that? In my opinion it is someone who is not coaching material. All due respect to my son I will not confront this person about his mistake in handling something that should have been done in private or just kept his mouth quiet about it until that season had come about. I don't think that I want my son playing for that type of coach. Any suggestions?

Going Private

Hello Everyone--

I am going to make this blog private so if you want to be added to my list please let me know and I will add. I will make this effective in 2 weeks.

Thanks for understanding

Myths

There are some myths that go around about people with DII. One is that you can't eat anything with sugar in it----NOT SO! People with DII can eat anything that other people do but in moderation. I need can eat cake, cookies, chips, pumpkin bread and any other crazy thing I want, but I choose not to over indulge. DII people need to eat more fruits, vegetables and proteins than other people. We need to really watch our Carb intake that is what makes you have a spike in your sugar levels and is the main thing that produces to much insulin in your body.

Like the Health Care Providers are telling people you need to get back to the basics of life and eating a more well balanced diet is the truth. I can remember back when I was growing up we grew our own vegetables and canned them to last through out the winter months and they usually did. We would have frozen beans, corn, canned carrots, my mother even one year made her own ketchup which was spicy but it was good. Canning these days is almost a lost art. We didn't have cookies and cakes and chips every day available to us we had fresh fruits, vegetables the other stuff was for special occasions only. I had forgotten how much I love vegetables and fruit until I was diagnosed with DII and now am getting back to loving to eat these things. I wish I lived in a house with a large yard to be able to put in a garden.

So if you see me eating a cookie (although I mostly choose not to these days) don't sweat it it's OK to have it in MODERATION as with all things. I do need to start drinking more water though and am working on it but with lots of years with out forcing myself to drink it I have to retrain my body and mind.

The average persons blood sugar reading in the morning should be between 70 and 100. Mine was 110 which having DII is pretty darn good. Also, after you eat your sugar levels (if you eat properly) should only raise 20-30 points. Most days I do good but there are stress days that it doesn't. We will touch on that another time.

Changes

Well I decided to change up my blog a little bit. I have diabetes II and for the past two years I have been watching what I eat and exercising more than I have in the past. If you don't know what Diabetes II is it is also called Adult Onset Diabetes but even teenagers can get it as well. With DII (diabetes II) your body produces to much sugar and your liver and pancreas don't know what to do with it so it stays in your blood stream. You can become very drowsy and sleepy all the time, not much energy, have to go to the bathroom a lot and it even cause sleeplessness at night. It is not a fun disease to have. Most people think that only overweight people have it---NOT TRUE! I went to a diabetes education class and there were people of all shapes and sizes in the class. Some you wold look at and think they look like they could not have it at all, but it is a quiet disease and people you think might have it don't and people you think couldn't possible have it do. It is not picky about who it contracts itself with.

SO I have started working out at Curves after work three nights a week and I have lost 4.50 inches around my stomach and lost a few pounds (can't remember how much at this time) it is a gym for women only and I have met some amazing women there and they have told as well as showed me there weight losses and they are astounding. I feel better going there and my family notices that I am a happier person and they encourage me to keep on going. That alone is such a great affirmation to me that they want me to be happy and do what makes me smile.

In the new changes I will try to blog as much as possible about how my blood sugar reading are doing as well as my Curves workouts. They a great system there called Curves Smart where it tells you how well you are working your target areas and how many calories you burn during that session. So here's to wishing me luck!

Goodness

I am at my wits end on trying to get my 17 year-old to follow my directions. He thinks because he is a "High School Graduate" soon to be "College Student" that he can just come and go as he pleases and do what ever he wants. Well sorry son you can't and if you don't like it tough! I told him if he is living in my home he has to follow my rules---well that lasted all of one day. So I told him that when he turns 18 he can start paying room and board, move out on his own or follow my rules living in my house eating my food and using my utilities. That got him to thinking that he better settle down. I also told him that he needs to maintain a 3.0 average in College or he will have to pay for it for himself. It may seem that I am being overly strict and demanding, but I grew up with no boundaries in my life and feel that if I had some that I could have done better for myself. I lived on my own since I was 18 and I want better for my kids and more for them out of life than what I had. I love my boys with all of my heart and soul but all kids need boundaries in life.

The past few months have been a whirlwind of emotions, struggles and some accomplishments but it seems the accomplishments are getting farther and farther apart. I need to just purge all the junk from my home and life and I get more frustrated each and every day that I put it off. I am going to just have to stop procrastinating and bite the bullet and get rid of all the junk. As my friend the lovely mother of all children says "I choose" and I need to choose what is best for me. Thank you oh lovely Mother of All, love you to pieces.

Graduation

I still can not believe my oldest son is going to graduate High School next week. It just does not seem possible. The one good thing about him graduating is that he will be attending HCC in the fall so he will still be around. That is until he goes on his mission. Then I will be really sad to see him leave for two years with only two phones allowed a year. ***SIGH***

He is a good kid and he surely loves his momma. He is the one with the big cheesy smile but then again that is just the way he is and I love him to pieces.

Names!

I know this may seem like a I am making a big deal out of something so small but it bothers and has bothered me since before my son was born. My oldest sons name is Steven, not Steve, Steveo or any other form of Steven that you can think of. I wish people would call him Steven! It start before he was born with my sister saying that "oh, you will be calling him Steve before he is one.". NOT happening and will not happen! There is someone I know who insists on calling him Steve and no matter how many times I tell him his name is Steven not Steve he refuses to stop calling him Steve. I have turned the other cheek so many times around this person that they are starting to get bruises on them. I just want to tell him how rude he is by calling him that, but I get so frustrated with this person as well as other people get frustrated by him as well for other things he has said or done to their kids as well. So how would you deal with this person?? It's not like we can avoid him since they have contact with him every day.

How's married life??????

So many people have been asking me how I like being married????!!! Well it has only been 3 weeks since we have been married, but so far it's like just before except he is always around. It seems surreal to me how comfortable and easy we have adjusted to being married and living together. I mean we had been seeing each other for about say 7-8 years, even though we've know each other for 10 years this coming October. I really did not like Ron when I first met him, I thought he was rude and arrogant and just plain mean! But, once I got to know him, figured out it was just his shyness around people he didn't know.

But back to the real issue......I like being married, in fact it is nice to have someone to worry about me and my boys for a change as well as having someone taking care of me for a change. Granted I don't know how long this "honeymoon" will last but I am going to take advantage and enjoy it while it lasts.

The boys seem to have adjusted extremely well to having Ron around all the time too. Sometimes they will just go ask him if they can do things or if Ron is home they will not call me to tell me that they are home from school, practice etc., kinda makes me miss it.

It is also nice to have someone to just be able to let them handle some things and to hold me when I have had a bad day, just as long as he keeps massaging my feet for me I will be a happy woman! I told him you know the old saying....Happy Wife, Happy Life.

WHEW!

Well, we did it, we got married. It was a very beautiful day and I was so thankful that it was a nice sunny but windy day. I was very surprised at how many people showed up to show us their love and support to us at the Temple for our marriage ceremony and for the sealing of Steven and Shawn to us for all time and eternity.

I could not look at any of my friends that were so supportive and helpful to make my day special as I would have started crying and would not have been able to stop. Kim, Laurie, Karen, Tami, Regina, Mitzi, Paloma, Lisa and Kim K., are the most wonderful women in my life. They planned every little detail and carried it out to make it run so smoothly. If I have forgotten anyone please forgive me as I was overwhelmed and still am at the love you showed for me and Ron that day as well as the days that proceeded the wedding. Kelly made a lovely cake for the reception that looked like a professional cake decorator made it, but she did it out of love for us and because she likes to do that sort of thing. My friend Ann and her husband Glenn for saying the prayer at the Ring ceremony and the Bishop for over seeing the ceremony. A special thanks to Debra and Dave for the use of their beautiful farmhouse for the reception and to Chris and Bonnie for doing a wonderful job on the landscaping, flowers and cleaning up of the farmhouse for the wedding. It would not have turned out as beautiful as it did with out all of you.

My cousin Vanessa sang so beautifully at the ring ceremony that their wasn't to many dry eyes in the place. I was so overjoyed that Vanessa's mother and my Aunt Daughn and my cousins Mindy and Gary came, as well as my mother, oldest brother Jim, his wife Bonnie, my niece Jessica and her mother Michelle and my two college roommates Lisa and Elisa.

The boys looked so handsome in their tuxedos that I couldn't help but cry a little. Ron was very handsome as well and I have never seen him smile so much in my life. The reception was amazing as I was shocked and overjoyed to see so many of my friends come that I have not seen in a long time as well as all my co-workers showed up. We are still receiving gifts that Ron is awed by how many people love us. As my friend Susan said to us on Saturday night it was the wedding of the century that a lot of people have been waiting for, for a long time (she wasn't kidding).

Thank you again to all my friends that donated their time, food and all around love and support to us YOU are all amazing and we love all you to bits.

One Week to GO

Goodness how time had flown by! In one week I will be married to the man I truly love with all my heart, mind and soul. He is my soul mate, my rock, my better half (what a better half he is), my eternal love. He is started to get a little excited about it as well, but if you know Ron he does not let people that he does not know very well anyways, know he is getting excited. He is in such a good mood these days that people are commenting on it. Well you know he is getting married to me and that as Martha says, It's a good thing! The boys are getting excited to they are very happy that he finally stepped up and asked. They love him just as much as I do.

Although my cat Misty will not be happy that she will not be allowed to sleep with me anymore. She thinks she is the Queen of the castle. She was highly upset when I went to visit my mother when she was sick and Ron came and stayed with the boys. He slept in my bed, fixed a few things and she was not happy. She used to like him a lot but now she wants nothing to do with him. So it will be real interesting when he moves in.

Well I hope to see all of you at the wedding and the reception.

YIPEE!

Steven just accepted at SVU (Southern Virginia University) and on top of that he received scholarships as well. The Lord has and is blessing this family in so many ways these days. He is so Wonderful! Steven was so excited that I swear he was smiling in his sleep last night because this morning he got up and got ready for Seminary and school with no grumbling or hassles and actually got to eat breakfast before he left instead of as he is walking out the door.

Now comes the fun part to figure out how much grant money he gets etc. Well with him we will know what to expect when Shawn gets to this point. On another note, we finally received the date for Steven's graduation which is June 2, 2010 at 12:00 Noon. I can't believe that he is old enough to graduate from High School and then going off to College, then the next thing you know he will be leaving on his mission. Which he wants to go to Australia for.......my baby is growing to fast. Sigh. To all you parents out there don't let your babies grow up. Keep them small for as long as you can. I just know my heart is going to be breaking when I have to take him to college, of course you know I am going to cry and have many sleepless nights for a while.

Bridal Shower

WOW is all I can say. I have some truly wonderful, amazing, awesome, fantastic and lovely friends. They gave me a bridal shower last night and I was truly amazed and awed by how many people came for me. I am not used to having so many people shower me with such love. I was up much later than my usual bed time (9-9:30 PM) looking at all the wonderful gifts that people gave to Ron and I for our new home that we will be making together.

Of course we played a game as I was opening the gifts and of course I was slightly embarrassed by some of the questions that were asked. By it was all in the sense of fun so it was nice. They had the most beautiful cake that was done in dark and light purple colors with a beautiful flower arrangement on top that Regina did. They had dark and light purple M&M's as well. I felt truly well loved.

I took my future MIL and she had a great time and said that she would have to come to more functions that I invite her to since she felt like a part of the group. YEAH! Thanks to all my friends for making her feel so welcome. She doesn't always feel comfortable with people but she laughed and felt at home.

Knowing what truly awesome people I have in my life makes me get more excited about my upcoming wedding than the scared feeling that has seem to be taking over. What a blessing it is to have such wonderful people in my life and in my boys life as well.

27 Days and Counting.......

Last Saturday we ordered our wedding bands and I went and picked them up last night and boy do they sure look pretty. I am getting more and more excited as the days get closer. This next week is sure turning out to be a busy one. Monday I have a meeting, Tuesday I am visit teaching, Wednesday, I get my hair colored, final dress fitting, Shawn has a lacrosse game at 4 so I told Ron he had to go to that, At 7 on Wednesday is my bridal shower. Thursday Steven has a scrimmage, we are supposed to spend the day at the temple, Friday Ron has a band gig and I think I want to go with him, Saturday is the start of Stake Conference and I know there is something else going on but for the life of me I can't remember what.

The boys are at Lacrosse practice now and then I think after next week the scrimmages will be over and the regular season starts. Steven is so excited that the team voted him a captain for Lacrosse, YEAH Steven! Shawn is just excited to be able to play that he thinks he may be a starter as well, GO Shawn. Life is getting busier by the minute and I can't wait until I am Mrs. Ronald Hutchison. Ron informed me today that he is cleaning out some of his stuff which is funny because he has a lot of stuff.

We want to see if friends of ours are serious about selling their townhouse and how much they are asking for it. It is a nice sized townhome and would be the perfect size for us. So keep your fingers crossed.

Not Far Now Papa Smurf!

Well it is a month away that I will be married in the Temple for all time and eternity to the love of my life. On Sunday I had my interview with President Johnson for my temple recommend to get married in the Temple and I love talking to him. He is a very profound man and he is wise beyond his years. Some people say that he intimidates them, but I for one don't think that. He gave me some great wisdom to think about and adhere to before and after I am married. As each day goes by I think and reflect on what he told me and I can't help but smile as I ponder the scriptures and his words seem to reflect themselves in what I am reading.

I went and had my yearly eye exam so that I could have contacts for my wedding. I had contacts many years ago but with trying to deal with two babies it was too difficult to do on a daily basis when I could just slip on my glasses. Ron told me that I looked good in contacts and coming from him makes me feel special since he does not give compliments very easily. I text my son Steven and he said nice, I told him that "your momma looks HOT" he was laughing and knowing him he had a big smile on his face and the people around him were wondering what he was laughing and smiling about.

So back to the wedding, I can't wait I am getting more and more excited as well as nervous each day that it gets closer. One of the best things (besides marrying Ron) is that my favorite cousin, my fathers oldest living sister, my favorite brother, my niece and her mom and my college roommate are all coming for the wedding. Not to mention all my sisters in Christ are doing an amazing awesome job with helping me to prepare for the event. I am so glad that I have them in my life, they are WONDERFUL WOMEN OF CHRIST!

2nd fitting-DONE

Well on Wednesday we had my second fitting and they still had to take it in a little more. My dress makes me feel like a princess, I still can not believe that I am getting married in six (6) weeks. GULP! A few things that are good about this is that some of my family from New York are planning on coming YEAH! Since joining the Church I have found out that I love my family and I sure did miss a lot of my cousins growing up after my parents got divorced and I am so thankful that I am making up for lost time now.

So the cake has been ordered and it is going to be beautiful (Thanks Kelly)! Now we need to talk hair, make-up, flowers, reception food and the list goes on and on. but I am starting to get nervous even more so than last post.

Oh yeah I also bought my shoes and they are kind of slipper like shoes and I just love them. Off to do some more planning have a great day.

UPDATE!

Well, I got my shoes for the wedding which are ballet type shoes and are so cute! We picked out the wedding cake and how we want it done. Kelly really rocks on these things and I can't thank her enough for offering to make our cake and make it affordable to us. Invitations will be mailed on 2/20/10. The food I am going to leave up to my friends Aldi and Susan to decide since that will be one less thing I have to worry about. Got to get with Regina on the Flowers, Paloma on the hair, Karen on the make-up gotta buy rings, license, temple recommends........and the list still goes on and on and on and on and on...........

GULP!

So it is about eight weeks until I am supposed to marry for all time and eternity with Ron. But I am having difficulties sleeping and thinking (which is really a bad thing for me to do) about all that needs to get done and will I get it done on time, why did Heavenly Father choose us to be together. We have gone through a few rough patches and he has had to deal with all the issues I have with certain members of my family and he still is sticking by me. Will I be a good enough wife for him, to him, am I good enough for him? Will this wedding turn out the way I want it to? I don't have enough time in the day for all that I need to do and yet I am not sleeping either. There are nights that I just sit in my bed and cry and I can't stop myself. I guess that coming from a very dysfunctional family and always feeling like I am not good enough is catching back up to me as well as the feeling that I will never amount to anything. I go to the scriptures and some days/nights they help and other time it doesn't. I am the type of person who will not ask people for help and that I know is a bad thing to do because I need to stop holding things in but I just can't help myself. I miss my best friend who always was there for me and I know that if she were here in Maryland she would just know that I need her without me saying anything.

I truly love Ron with all my heart and soul and can't wait to marry him but it is so hard to stop these doubts that I have. I guess I will have to continue to pray to Heavenly Father and wait for his answer. We all go through trials and tribulations and we come out strong in the end but I hate having to go through them. I can not and will not let the evil one keep these negative thoughts in my head any longer he has no control over me or my prosperity. I feel so much better now that I have let this all out. Thanks for listening.

Oh no it's almost time!

Well as of this coming Saturday it will be only Three (3) months til I marry the love of my life to spend time and all eternity with him. YIKES! It sure has gone by fast. I still have lots to do like get a veil, slip, some other unmentionables, shoes, figure out the food, flowers, the cake, send out invitations gulp! I did get the invitations bought we just have to print them out. Ron has this really great printer at work that uses crayon type ink to print things and it looks great when done. I just hope that I don't forget to invite someone to the wedding, get real nervous during the ceremony and get sick or something, or cry for that matter.

Before the wedding day even gets here I have so much going on in my life that I am certain I will forget something that I need/have to do. I am starting to get really nervous about this and sometimes I ask Ron why don't we just run away and get married then come back???? He says it would upset to many people.

I know that with my Heavenly Fathers help I will survive and be able to get things done as well as a great bunch of Sisters to help. I just love being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. There are so many wonder people in the church and makes me wonder why I did not search out this church before? Of course you know I grew up Methodist and in a very dysfunctional family so I only heard negative things about other religions. But then I met the love of my life and he introduced me to the church and as they say the rest is history. Now I just need to remember to breathe and everything will work out for the best. Right????